Somedays Are Harder Than Others

by Doorstopper

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1.
04:25
Ha, You make me sick. I hope I make YOU sick. but not really... Spend your time wisely Stop looking at me with those eyes...Like Your EYES. Don't use them to look at me! Stop staring, stop feeling like everyone is always staring. I wish everyone would stop yelling at me. I hope they do not understand. I hope they keep yelling, but not so loudly. Falling down. I should stop throwing my trash in the road. Everything seems so strange.
2.
Work is fun for you. A game you play to pass time. I work to survive, I work to survive. The privilege, the not knowing will never understand. Empathetic privilege. The privilege, the not knowing will never understand. Apathetic privilege. Work is fun for you. A game you play to pass time. I work to survive, I work to survive. The privilege, the not knowing will never understand. Empathetic privilege. The privilege, the not knowing will never understand. Apathetic Privilege. Life is fun for you. A game you play to pass time. I laugh all the time.
3.
They've all chosen to be sheep following through with their cookie cutter lives. Getting caught up in the clogged system wondering..."What my plans are for today?" Wondering WHY I always have to have a plan for today. Why I can't make the decision as it comes to me in the moment. Wondering how I can get out of this traditional way of living because I do NOT want a good credit score. Because if I can't afford it. I wont buy it! Hoping I never have to take out another fucking loan, wishing I could free myself from the chains of debt and stabilize myself with good health instead of a desk job hating my rudimentary life, monotonous and unfulfilling. Can we live within our means? No credit cards or empty gambles, no high-interest loan. No ball-and-chained to the nation 1 week of paid vacation Bullshit! Sit down America, in your office desk chair, sit up straight and answer the phone already! Be the sheep you were meant to be. Conform to your 401k-social-security-paying-highly-insured-lifestyle. Live for the weekends and learn to dread Mondays. Build up for retirement and slowly die in your second home near the beach. Relax until your brain falls right out of your skull and tumbles onto your freshly mopped floor because my plan today, is to clean up this mess. Cocktail hour comes quick so get to it. Drink until you have a story to tell. Exhaust yourself over monotony. Go grocery shopping, fuck it, go straight to the mall we need new things, buy the stuff and set it up feel the rush as your retirement fund dwindles and your lust for life resides in nightly news, something to complain about. Consider me convinced. My life IS and will ALWAYS BE a vacation. Weekends are every damn day of my life and if I do not like it, I will Change. Comfort is not a high priority. Neither is conformity. I will not be in debt Forever.
4.
Driving the car. Working the job. Going deaf. Driving the car. Working the job. Go to bed. Stuck between a sandwich and a taco-pizza-sundae feeling like i'll have some shit to say some day. (X3) Driving the car. Working the job. Going deaf. Driving the car. Working the job. Go to bed. Stuck between a sandwich and a taco-pizza-sundae feeling like i'll have some shit to say some day. (X3)
5.
I like eatin pizza with friends and drinking beer cuz we don't have to work anymore and it's the weekend now and, we're eating pizza I'm hanging with my friends and drinking fuckin beer cuz it's the weekend now and I like hanging with my friends and eating pizza it's time for the weekend let's drink beer. Pizza, Pizza, Pizza Sometimes we get fucked up at the bar and check the garbage behind the buffet, and we're eating free pizza now and drinking beer cuz it's the weekend, and who doesn't like melted cheese on bread and drinking beer with friends, we're having fun cuz it's the weekend. Pizza, Pizza, Pizza My friends like to eat pizza and laugh loud while their drinking beer cuz its the weekend now and we don't have to work and we like eating pizza and drinking beer. Melted cheese on bread, Melted cheese on bread. Pizza, Pizza, Pizza.
6.
05:38
To be a sheep, To be a wolf, To get eaten up just like grandma. A cog in a machine, This is not a dream. This is not a drill. I need a verse to explain this mess, A day of rest to reflect. Unchain my shackles of employment. I can't go to work Anymore! I am sick. I am sick. I am sick of being here EVERYDAY. Retail, Retail, Stock, place, rotate, break down box repeat, beat my head against a wall. Fuck expiration dates and the whole system while we're at it. To be a sheep, To be a wolf, To get eaten up just like grandma. A cog in a machine, This is not a dream. This is not a drill. Get up, Stand up, Right now! Your head's in a sad gutter. Greyspace, overcasted, blasted. What is time but a mystery? Punch out, Read deeper. Dig for facts, it's a misinformation trap. Spit out truth. Assume less, know more. I am a guilty slob of lies, So are YOU! 90% grassroots, 10% politics dragging behind you. Exist in your community, welcome to reality. Connect our collective consciousness, quit getting so Fucked up all the time! To be a sheep, To be a wolf, To get eaten up just like grandma. A cog in a machine, This is not a dream. This is not a drill.
7.
I'm upset with society because I think i'm better than a 9-5 job. I'm sad because, I just can't get what I want. I'm aggravated because I wasn't given enough privilege. I'm so fucking sad because some people get sick and no one can make them healthy. I'm so upset because today my heart is broken and no one can fix it. I'm feeling so crummy because I have nothing to be mad about. I want to be with friends, but I want to be alone. I want to be vulgar and I don't want to be insensitive. I want to be fine, but I'm sad. I want to pretend like there's a reason, but there's not. I don't need any help but I want to spill my guts out and cry. I have to tell someone the truth soon because I am going to lose touch with myself soon and I don't know who I am. I care so much. I don't care enough. I say to much and it's not important. I'm all talk and no walk. I'm broken up and beat down. I'm weak and confident. I'm a running sprinting, leaping, galavanting, contradiction with no religion. Sometimes, you can't look tough enough. Sometimes, you just don't show up. It's exactly a game of mystery. You're so alluring. You're so everything all at once. Don't try to understand me. Don't pretend to care. I'm closed up and you're locked out. I'm full of sad, sad news. I'm not doing well again. I've got a case..of the blues.
8.
9.
06:22
So you're thinking 'bout this and you're thinking 'bout that, Plug into the screen I.V., until your eyes bleed. Inject yourself until you wreck yourself, it pains me to see your brains melt while you spend time trying to decide the next netflix flick you'll waste away watching. Illusiary, televisual, disconnect. Illusiary, televisual, disconnect. Why don't you disconnect? I lost myself, my sense of self in the virtual world again. What did you say? I was away, I felt you feel something. I was lifted and drifted, scrolling away it happens all the time no one ever listens, no one ever listens. llusiary, televisual, disconnect. Illusiary, televisual, disconnect. Why don't you disconnect? Where are all my friends? Why are they laying in bed? ..laid up, splayed out, excuses of lost time. A few more seasons left, one more episode to go, then it will be time and i'll be just fine to make more of myself. llusiary, televisual, disconnect. Illusiary, televisual, disconnect. Why don't you disconnect?

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To purchase physical copies of the cassette in hard shell case with digital download code... please check out www.mostexcellentrecords.com

credits

released November 9, 2017

Written/Performed by Doorstopper:

Melissa Haack (lyrics, vocals)
Jarad Olson (guitar)
Steven Spoerl (drums)

Additional help from:
Tyler Debelak (3)

Recorded/Mixed by Tyler Debelak
Mastered by Jarad Olson
Released by Most Excellent Records

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Doorstopper Stevens Point, Wisconsin

Soul searching for soullessness with a positively agitated attitude. Eating shit, hard. Getting the fuck back up. More please.

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